It All Started With...

…this comment about a road sign. Dani, my twin sis and fellow author, remarked on it as we drove down the road toward our hotel the first day in Ireland. It looked like this: ella sheridan, bog, signs, dani wade She’d seen it before, in Scotland. The “picnicking in the middle of the highway” sign, she called it, or as I affectionately refer to it, the “large Tron robots ahead” sign. “They have a lot of weird signs over here,” she said. “Like the one in the airport?” I asked. “Exactly.”

What sign in the airport, you might ask? This one:

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs I noticed it right off. “What does that mean?” No one else in our group knew. A bit giddy from a fourteen-hour trip and almost no sleep, I said, “It means…flee!” “Run very fast this way!” Dani said. And we laughed like drunken hyenas.

And thus began our journey into the Wacky World of Irish (and English) Signs. Scroll down to journey through this wacky world with us; then hop over to Dani’s page to see even more. It’s totally worth it, I assure you. :)

And we begin with:

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs Apparently “Enter” isn’t clear enough. But hey, way to declare yourself in the “in” crowd—not just “in,” but “way in.”

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

I would not have expected to find a Georgia Bull Dawgs fan in the middle of Ireland, but there it was. Of course, the same town had two pizza restaurants, one named Kentucky and one named Apache Pizza. What can I say?

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

This restaurant sign was my favorite, found somewhere in London near the end of our trip. For those who can’t see it clearly, it says, “Hummus Bros” and below, “Give Peas A Chance”. I can’t help but picture dozens of tiny peas bouncing up and down, begging, “Pease, pease eat us!” Dani: With French accents, like in Veggie Tales. ;)

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

Note the reference to accommodations in the pic above. Apparently Hussey doesn’t have to go far to get her "gig" on. Right upstairs, in fact. Convenient. Dani: It gives a whole new meaning to “Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am!”

The road signs, like the one we started out with, were particularly interesting. The one below I gathered to mean “Old-fashioned photos ahead."

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs Dani: Because we all need pictures of ourselves driving, right?

And then there’s this:

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

I can’t figure out if this is an instruction (“Yield!") or a warning (“Something’s about to give way! Watch out!”)

I’m not sure what it is about Europeans and arrows, but these...

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signsella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

...are particularly, um, unpointed. In fact, you might call them…flaccid. Or half-mast and decidedly uninterested, not sure which. Dani: How about floppy?

Speaking of flaccid:

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

I had to nab this one off their website since we walked by here way past dark, and trust me, around midnight, it looks a lot dirtier than it does in this picture. Talk about false advertising. Dani: Hey, I wanted to stop...

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

What is it with the penis references? Jeez. Apparently only the British have “Great Knobs.” ^_^ Dani: Or dirty ones. All I can think about when I see this is, Great Knobs of Fire! A new kind of burn. :p Of course the idea of the British having “greater knobs” might be played out by something our Irish tour guide, D, said about midway through the trip. We’d stopped at a buffet restaurant hanging over the cliffs on the Ring of Kerry, and it just so happened that the line for food snaked past the men’s restroom (or toilet, as they say over there). It was one of those with the little hall leading to the door, so all that could be seen was the opposite wall, nothing exciting. D, however, came up about the time I passed said door and firmly closed it. “We don’t want that open, now, do we?” she said. I shrugged. “I figured I couldn’t see anything, so I wasn’t worried about it.” D huffed. “Well why would you want to? Nothing to see, really. I mean, you’ve seen it all before, haven’t you?” And then she wandered off, leaving me staring, wide-eyed, after her. Apparently Irish “knobs” are a bit less “great”; once you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all. Dani: According to her... I'd like to see one, just to be sure. Ah-hem. Onward. Speaking of food, there’s no better way to describe a chip than:

ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

Really? Apparently even the makers couldn't figure out what these were! Okay, okay, I could go on forever. But thankfully I don’t have to, since Dani has more great signs over on her blog today. So slide… ella sheridan, dani wade, blog, signs

…on over to Dani’s website and continue the amusement. (No climbing, food, dangling your toes in the water, or hand shaking, though!) Hope you enjoyed all these wotsits—and Dani’s—as much as I did!